Saturday, December 24, 2005


*im feeling blue today*

today is hell day. like totally. hai..got woken up by dad at 8am in the morning for duno wad reason..think he duno the routine..den wake me up to tend to the monsters again..help!i was so pissed..coz i not enuff zzz mah..but in the end..no choice la..coz my dad din officially wake me up..juz open my room door w a bang n expects me to get up..n i noe if i dun wake up eventually to help him..it will b awkward for him to come n ask me to wake up n help..so i guai guai woke up loh..hai..

anw..tat was the start of my hellday..bro refuses to wake up..den dad decided to let him watch his vcd..till he was late for sch..+ he nv finish his milk..i had to look at him n scream at him to suck..diao..n finally..dad juz bring him to sch loh..hai..i took the chance to go back to zzz la..haha din care wad happened when dad came back w sis..juz wan my beauty zzz..

my sis's cry woke me up..think dad cant take it liao..he juz left her on the high chair..yes..tats wad he did..even when he noe im zzz..so u can see how much responsibility i haf..hai..woke up..feed my sis the cereal dad made n left on the table for her..n she refuses to eat..i duno y..after today..i realise im a rather failure..dun really noe wad my sibs are thinking..really hoping child psy will enlighten me..hai..but anw..she juz whine and whine..my goodness..u all can nv imagine how long and how loud she can cry man..n i got so frustrated tat i stopped feeding her..brought her to bath..yes..tats my job too..hai..n she said "mmmm"..i almost fainted..coz i taught her to say "mmm" when she wan shit..n she said tat when i was preparing the bath tub for her..so i prepare for her to shit..n..nothing came out..false alarm..-_-" make me so flustered..den bath her loh..hai..den dad came ask me sth..he was emailing can..while leaving me to tend to the little trouble maker..n ask me how send sms overseas or wad..all this while can hear my sis playing..den suddenly..she became v quiet..i tot she finally quieten down la..but noe wad?when i went back to her..she shat into the bath tub, n she was playing w it!!my goodness. i literally almost fainted..told my dad..heng he help me clean up the mess man..wah!!horrible start..

gave her her milk and she fell zzz while drinking = never finish the milk = make a fuss when wake up again = hell for me again..-_-" but think she was v tired + hungry + cannot shit so make so much noise in the morning loh..n she zzz for like 4hrs..yay!!peace n silence for 4hrs!!haha but this time..bro came back fr sch..he was ok la..went zzz at ard 2 loh..so i got time to myself for the 1st time in the day..dad zzz..n me?i went online for awhile to entertain myself ah..den i see the piling up clothes of my sibs..n my dad oblivious to them..so i took the initiative to handwash them..hai..my hand is so gg to rot..n my nails r gg to chip..die man..n so..i left my status as a tai tai for like the 2nd time of my life..n make myself do all this shit..so tiring can..i dun even noe if i used the right detergent..haha but heck la..n squeezing the water out was the hardest part man..considering how "strong" im..haha o..n u wun believe the amount of clothes tat piled up juz yest n today loh..my sis change clothes like nobody business lidat loh..think she 1 day at least change clothes 5 times..+ my bro..oh gosh..my arms ache loh..my hands r pain..=( but still finished la..den i take down the dry clothes..fold them..iron some..fold the cloth diapers..in short..tiring..super duper tiring..n all this while wad my dad do?nothing..argh..mayb he did alot during the morning la..i duno..but like i folding clothes all tat he juz watch tv loh..den suddenly he say "erm..do u wan any present?" haa think tats his way of showing his appreciation ba..my chance to get 1 of my 2 wans..but somehow i duno how to voice out to him loh..but anw..this pres is my bday pres..they got me nothing for my bday..sad life..

den my sis "eh eh eh" again..gosh..the little monster is awake!!made her milk again..she drank quite fast ah..coz she zzz quite long - 4hrs, normally every 3hrs drink 1 time milk..so i guess she was hungry ba..den create trouble again..gosh..thank god i manage to contain my anger today..but at 1 point i was so irritated tat i wanted to hit her..hai..bad sister im..haha but her cries r really horrible..terrible..alot of descriptive terms i can use..den i wake my bro up..so now 2monsters in action..heng bro today quite behave himself..got barney on kids central ah..so for 1hr lidat my sibs sort of behave themselves..though my sis still "eh eh eh" here and there la..den is dinner time..my dad made soup la..but he cook the "a b c" macaroni w the soup too long..tat the noodles expand n stick together like dough lidat..n my bro refuses to eat..n he requested for steam egg..goodness..n so..ahem..presenting to u..the cook of the chan family - me!!haha some1 hu is afraid of on-ing the fire on the stove has to cook for my dear hoyan..lucky the kitchen nv explode..i nv defrost the minced meat..forced the meat to break by hand..another torture for my hands..hai..den cook the noodles for him loh..abit not successful la..but at least abit better den my dad..haha forced bro to eat..den 2nd dish..steamed egg..i 1st time make can..my mom told me by mouth how to make yest..n i had to practise it today..she told me steam for 3-5mins wor..bullshit..but in the end the steam egg was..erm..rather nice la..so my bro had a filling dinner loh..heng ah..thank god..=)

o..n all this while..dad refuses to feed bro n sis..wonder wad is his freaking prob..i haf to run fr the kitchen to the living rm loh..like every few sec..n for those hu been to my hse b4 should noe my kitchen not v near to the living rm loh..i was pissed..im still pissed when im typing this entry..hope by tml i'll feel better..but really loh..like wad the hell loh..he really dun do anything leh..leave everything to me while he watch his stupid tv..argh!!!!den mom called n he go out fetch her..den my sis likes to go out 1..obviously wan follow him right..n i was washing the dishes/pots and all loh..n he came to the kitchen door and grumble..say how can he take care of so many..like indirectly say i nv do anything lidat loh..like wad the f***!!!so anw..i carry my sis n entertain her while they go out..n she cry again la..obviously..can count how many times she cry liao?argh..

den im left alone w this small screaming machine..give her milk again..wan put her to zzz again..entertain her..read to her..dance w her..play w her.."eh eh eh"!!!#^*@! n they still not back..hai..finally they came back..i decide to leave everything to them la..afterall..they are the parents, not me..but noe wad?after dinner..dad went back to tv..help me man!!think i wan explode liao..he nv do the dishes..nor did he take care of my sibs when i ard..like when i ard he juz shift the entire responsibility to me loh..so i decided to juz leave him alone w my sibs..see wad he can do la..haa so he no choice loh..after awhile..he fell zzz..mom did the dishes..den tend to her children..after like juz 30mins she got pek cek..wonder how she would b when she stay hm whole day w them..haha n after alot of whining..crying..pouting..screaming..i decided to put sis to bed..n yes!!i succeeded!!now she is zzz soundly in her rm..juz hopes she dun wake in the middle of the nite ah..n bro..hope he gets well soon..haha

hmm..darling went 1903 party today ah..glad he had fun n tat i din go..if not i'll feel so outcast..but happy tat he met up w his frens ah..haha think he's happy too..at least not everytime see my face..hor jh!?haha n thank god he's finally getting better n recovering..=) i nv buy any christmas present for him ah..not for any1..not even christmas card..haa so u all dun expect to receive anything fr me k?this yr christmas dun feel like christmas to me..duno y..juz no mood la..n im gg hk soon..but i dun feel excited at all..hai..something is wrong w me..

oo..today is results day..i was so busy tat i forgotten bout it..until my dear chinru msg me..haha rather upset bout my grades ah..its like back to tj times again..hate the feeling..i feel stupid..like totally stupid..im really not cut out for studying..dear jh pls take me out of my misery soon..haha i dunhaf to b a tai tai..i was wan to b away..u noe me right..hai..shall try harder nxt sem..but guess my limit is lidat la..hai..笨就是笨，猪脑就是猪脑。like my fren say..mayb tis is god's plan for me..i duno..shall let him lead the way..but i really duno how many more sems of this shitty feeling i can take..some1 pls help me..=(

sorry xq..haha told u this blog is dedicated to my sibs..mayb my nxt blog entry ok?=) ur name appeared once..in a whole separate paragraph..=)


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